Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Florence Nightingale She is Not

So a couple weeks ago I had minor surgery on both of my feet. I am not the brave soul type with a high pain threshold, nope that's not me. I have a pain threshold of about a three out of ten.

So the day after the procedure I had to change the bandages and soak my feet. I was pretty apprehensive about what I was going to find under the mummy wrap. My feet didn't really hurt when they were wrapped, but for me it is all about - the thought. I see someone else with a cut finger - and I transpose the pain they MUST be feeling to myself and down I go to the floor!

So I was carefully taking the bandages off, I decided to take the main wraps off down to the small pieces of gauze on the wounds. I decided to go this far on both feet before removing them completely so that I wouldn't pass out or get grossed out when I saw the first one and not want to do the second one.

So I have one foot down to the gauze pieces, which might be stuck to the wound so I will have to be very careful taking those last pieces off. Reese was laying in the bathroom watching the whole production raising her eyebrows from time to time at me like I was such a basket case (she was supposed to be providing moral support and a shoulder to lean on in my time of need).

Ha, right!

She was there in my time of need alright. As I was taking off the outside bandages of the second foot she decided the entire production was going ridiculously slow and decided to speed up the process. 

She jumped up ripped the gauze off the first foot and ran with it.....before I could realize what she had done I was looking at my bare foot - wound and all.  Leave it to a border collie to get er done!

Last weekend I was awakened during the night from the most horrible charley horse in my calf. I reached down and felt the muscles contracting violently in my leg. I think it was the most painful charley horse I have had. Of course I haven't had one for years so who knows - but it hurt.

I was screaming out loud. It was so painful I even passed out a few times when I sat up to try to get it to stop. Luckily I was still in bed so I just hit the pillow. Ms. "Nightingale She is Not" was on the bed sleeping on the other side down by my feet.

As I lay there withering in pain I was trying to get her attention (you would think the screaming and bed thrashing would do it wouldn't you) by grabbing for her. I was touching her tail or her backside something furry, calling her name to get her to come up and lay closer to me for a little comfort while I recovered from the painful ordeal that good ole charley decided to cause.

Did she come to snuggle, nope.
Did we spoon, nooo.
Did she give me a nose touch kiss, not a one.

She didn't even flinch a muscle through the entire ordeal. Just laid there and slept like border collie that had run 20 miles over the Scottish Highlands looking for her missing lamb. (which I can assure you she did not).

So don't call her Florence by mistake. She won't answer - with good reason!

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